Today’s deal of the day is a complete handyman Leatherman tool that will make you a walking weapon of mass destruction. Figuratively, of course (I should be more careful throwing that term around). This deal of the day is $18.95 (39% off the $31 retail price). Sale ends at midnight tonight (EST).
Agent Peters, we have a problem.
What is it Agent Buttface?
I told you, it’s pronounced Butt-facé.
Sorry. Well, sir, it’s “Weapon X.”
Don’t tell me he’s broken the vending machines again.
I’m afraid it’s much worse. He’s escaped.
Escaped!? This is a national tragedy. Why, if “Weapon X” released his power on the masses, the consequences would be catastrophic.
I rue the day we eager scientists created something so powerful. Why did we not stop to think of the consequences!? Why?!
Would you stop having those John Grisham epiphanies all the time? But you’re right, we never should have given “Weapon X” that Leatherman. Just think of it, Peters. When we surgically attached those leatherman tools in place of his hands, he became unstoppable. Spring-action scissors and personal care features, Clip-Point Knife, Tweezers, Nail File, Flat Phillips Screwdriver, Bottle Opener. Why, if he has enough time to run wild, think of all the squeaky cabinets he’ll fix and the manicures he’ll give and the beers he’ll open.
He’s probably out there right now having a moving emotional experience with a woman or small child who’s helping him see that he’s not just a weapon meant to destroy, but a heart meant to love.
Okay, now you’ve moved on to Robert Ludlum. It doesn’t make it okay.
That’s it, I’m calling the President. Weapon X needs to be stopped.
Too late. The Leatherman is now selling as the deal of the day on JomaDeals at a 39% discount. In less than 24hrs, every American in America will have one of their own.
Every American in America…God help us all. SPECS
Spring-action scissors and personal care features that fit on your key chain are just part of what makes the Micra truly unique.
Ten useful tools are packed into this tiny, lightweight Leatherman.
Scissors; Clip-Point Knife; Tweezers; Nail File / Cleaner; Flat Phillips Screwdriver; Extra Small
Screwdriver; Medium Screwdriver; Bottle Opener; Ruler (Inch / Metric); Lanyard Attachment.
Length: 2.5 inches.
Weight: 1.75 ounces.
Leatherman Micra Keychain-size Green Multitool 64350103K Jomadeals.com does not ship outside the USA and its territories. Shoppers from outside the USA may place orders for delivery within the United States. Product ships 3-7 business days after order.